A Creative Dream

A Creative Dream

A little blog about the life of a somewhat lost dreamer....looking for my grace in this crazy world.

29 January 2018

It's a gift...

This creativity thing.  It really is a gift, or, at least that's the way I've always thought of it.  But, over the last couple of years, it's a gift that I've put on the back burner.  I left it there a bit too long, and suddenly I began to feel it slipping.

I can't even imagine my world without creativity in it. I've never really sat at my table and not had something come, but in the last six months or so, that's what I found happening. It's like this weird feeling of being lost in a forest, and yet knowing that the path is right in front of me. I know that path, I've walked it thousands of times, but it's a while now, and I can't quite find it. That feeling of creativity coursing through me hasn't been coming as easily.  You gotta use it or lose it, right?

So, to this end, I spent my weekend playing with watercolours.  Because if that isn't a challenge for me, I don't know what is.  I love them, they don't like me so much.  For me, it's a difficult medium to work with.  There's just so very little control (in my hand anyway).  My paintings generally have lots and lots and lots of layers, and those layers are achieved with acrylic paints, inks, papers...you know, things that don't lift when they get wet.  It allows for a great deal of hints and bits and pieces to show through. You can get lots of depth there. That's my comfort zone.

It doesn't quite work that way with watercolours.  So much more room to mess things up... (messing things up being defined as me putting the brush to paper and what comes off the brush is not what was in my head), and so little I can do about it.

Of course, that's really much like life, isn't it?  What we plan in our head isn't always what happens. Sometimes it doesn't even come close. I don't know about you guys, but when I was 18 and just facing the world I was absolutely certain about how everything was going to be.  Turns out, I had no clue.

I've learned much though, and one of the great truths I've found is that the best thing we can do is learn to let go and allow it to be. Life isn't lived in a straight line, but rather by following the hills and the valleys that we encounter.  Sometimes the path is smooth and even, other times it's rocky and difficult, that's how it's supposed to be.  We can't appreciate the easy path unless we've walked the difficult one.

Sort of like this journey of mine with watercolours. What comes out of that brush tip isn't always what I had envisioned...but I'm learning to allow it to be.  Although, I do admit, I very often have to talk to myself while I'm painting to remind myself that it's ok not to have control, after all, sometimes the best journeys taken begin with not knowing where you are going.  I'm finding that I get better and enjoy the process more when I don't have such a rigid mindset about what I want the painting to look like.

And, sometimes, while it isn't quite what I expected, it ends up being not half bad.

Life and watercolours, who knew they had so much in common?

21 January 2018


Very soon after I got home Friday evening I got walloped with a stomach bug.  Definitely not my finest hour.  Most of Saturday was shot, but, thankfully, today has been much better.  Not a great deal accomplished, but I did play a bit...

 If it looks somewhat familiar, it's because you've seen it before.  I did the original a couple of years ago.  This is a print I added a bit to.

I played with some cards...

These are 2.5 by 4.5 inches on 140 lb cold press Canson watercolor paper.  They're going to be part of my Random Acts of Kindness Week project.  (Did you know there is a National Random Acts of Kindness Day?  It's officially February 17th, but the entire week is encouraged... check it out here.)  More on that later, and I might need a couple of volunteers to help me, so keep an eye out.

And, finally, I did get a page done...

There is an awful lot of uncertainty in my life at the moment, and a great deal was written about that under the paint.  There are days I find it difficult to remember that the Universe provides what I need, but it is up to me to believe that.  It's important to not dwell in what "might" happen, but to remain open to all of the good things that may come.

So...there you have it.  My weekend, or what there was of it, of creativity.

What materials are you working with these days that you love?  I will always be a fan of my Canson paper, but I found something new a couple of weeks ago to play with.  Currently I'm LOVING Jane Davenport's Mermaid Markers.


I used them on the cards for the Random Acts of Kindness Day above.  The colors are amazing, and they're beautifully transparent.  They're a dye based ink, and really very easy to use.  The only issue I've had with them is that some of the brush bristles were closed into their lids, so they have wild hairs sicking up.  My current favorite is the Byron Bay.  Of course, Coral is really pretty too, and Blue Bottle... love that too.

She also has several bottled inks in her line and I think I may have to pick up a few of them.  They are all scented though, kinda makes me a little iffy about them. I wonder how strong it is, how long it lasts, etc.. Have any of you used them?  Is the scent very strong?  Does it linger?  Anyone have any other inks they like to use?  I'd love any suggestions you might have.

Please note:  I have received no compensation or product from either Canson or Jane Davenport.

15 January 2018


Last year will not go down in my personal history as a terribly creative year. 

Truthfully, I feel like much of last year was just a lost year, for many reasons... none of which are terribly important to this moment.  I spent an awful lot of time going to work, coming home, getting up and going to work again just to do it all over.

I think I was still mourning my dad, my dog and my niece.  I guess that likely won't change, but time does have a way of making you move forward.  

It wasn't a terrible year, my son and my bonus one got married in the best wedding ever.  It fit them perfectly.  My daughter got a new job, she now works with me, just in a different area, so I get to see lots of her, and I'm loving that (not sure how see feels about all that time with me).

I planted a garden for the first time in years, and loved every square inch of it, not to mention the harvest that came from it.

But now, it's time I return.  I've missed you all, and I feel like I need to be back here ticking along.  I can't make promises of faithfully publishing every single day, but I'm shooting for once a week or so.

Since last year wasn't creative, and I really need to be creative, I've promised myself that this year will be different. So, my word for the year is "Create". To that end I've been doing a little journaling... And, I have a question (ok, a few) for those of you who journal, especially those who do creative journaling...in general, how long do you spend on a page (or spread)? Do you go back to pages you thought were complete? Do you have a ritual or practice that goes with your journaling? Any tips, or hints, or suggestions for those who want to begin?

23 January 2017

My favorite...

Looking through the photos I took on Saturday, this has to be one of my favorites...quite possibly my most favorite...

I presume this is a father with his daughter, although I could be wrong.  It could be an uncle and his niece, a brother and his little sister, it could be a step-father and his step-daughter (although, I count that in the father/daughter category). The important thing here is that this man is supporting this little one, teaching her that these are goals worth working toward... and allowing her to realize her voice is important.  And, he is doing it by example... he is there. Men are important in this movement, and to all of those men out there who support, love, and encourage the women in their lives... thank you.

22 January 2017


I marched...

I marched for my friends who are people of all colors, for my gay friends, for my Muslim friends, for my disabled friends. I marched for all people who feel marginalized. I marched for those who are too afraid to let their voice be heard. I marched because all of our voices must be heard.

Today I marched because no one but me has the right to make choices for my body, and it is time that others stop thinking they can.
Today I marched because women have been treated as second class citizens since time began, and it is time for that to stop.

Today I marched because we, women, are the life givers, the nurturers, the care takers, the tradition keepers, and it is time for us to take our power back. It is time to realize our worth. To stand up for the rights of ourselves and others.

Today, I am marched because I will be that voice, I will stand with others and speak the truths that ALL people are equal, that ALL people have rights, that ALL people should be able to live their lives as they choose, without the judgement of others.

Today, I marched because I will be that voice, I will stand with others and speak the truths that ALL people are equal, that ALL people have rights, that ALL people should be able to live their lives as they choose, without the judgement of others.

Today I marched… and I was not alone.